What I’m Blogging

It’s the birthday of Ella Fitzgerald, born in Newport News, Virginia, in 1918. She loved to sing and dance as a child; and when she was 16, she entered a contest at the Apollo Theater - at that time no more than a hip local club in Harlem. She had a dance routine worked out, but once she got on stage she lost her nerve. So instead of dancing, she sang. She won the contest and soon became a celebrity across all of New York. She joined Cab Calloway and Duke Ellington as the only performers who could draw audiences at the Apollo from south of 125th Street.

Marilyn Monroe was one of her biggest fans. Ella said, “I owe Marilyn a real debt. It was because of her that I played the Mocambo, a very popular nightclub in the ’50s. She personally called the owner of the Mocambo, and told him she wanted me booked immediately, and if he would do it, she would take a front table every night. The owner said yes, and Marilyn was there, front table, every night. The press went overboard. After that, I never had to play a small jazz club again.”

From the Writer’s Almanac by Garrison Keillor
Available by e-mail daily.
Further harmonious reading available at Amazon.com

Time for an interesting little quiz. Haven’t done one for a while, but ran across this one on a friend’s Facebook entry and was curious about mine. Electronic sheep or what? More surprising still is the accuracy. I’ll leave you to sort out which parts. Enjoy.

Your Birthdate: February 14

You work well with others. That is, you’re good at getting them to do work for you. It’s true that you get by on your charm. But so what? You make people happy! You’re dynamic, clever, and funny. And people like to have you around. But you’re so restless, they better not expect you to stay around for long. Your strength: Your superstar charisma Your weakness: Commitment means nothing to you Your power color: Fuchsia Your power symbol: Diamond Your power month: May

Who will rid me of this troublesome hound? Man’s best friend has been taking some liberties of late, or more accurately “early”. It’s not enough that I house, feed, and clean up after this pooch, but for reasons surpassing all understanding, he has taken to requiring a potty break at approximately 5:00AM every day. It doesn’t matter when he last ate or drank, it has no bearing on when his last trip to the loo was. He is a creature of habit, and this particular habit runs like clockwork.

Having to let the creature out when barely awake is one thing, but when he takes your side of the bed after you let him back in is just insult upon injury. Worse still is that subtle realization growing in recesses of an overly tired mind that you are awake. It’s not the self realization that you are awake and that you should return to sleep, it is rather that sinking feeling knowing that you are awake, and that no amount of effort short of alcohol and/or narcotics will let you sleep. Crap.

Back in the prehistoric era when we humans domesticated these four legged fur covered bladders, it was not so much an issue. We lived in caves, dogs pretty much came and went on their own. Ten thousand years later, in our overly protective suburban environment with locked doors, dogs need our help to have a morning “constituational”. It’s high time I think, to start breeding the beasts with opposable thumbs. Then they could open their own @#%$ doors.

It’s the birthday of humorist Josh Billings, born Henry Wheeler Shaw in Lanesboro, Massachusetts (1818). He was a popular newspaper columnist and also published several books, including Josh Billings on Ice (1868) and Josh Billings’ Farmers’ Allminax (1870).

Billings said, “There are many people who are always anticipating trouble, and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen to them.”

And he said, “Don’t take the bull by the horns, take him by the tail; then you can let go when you want to.”

From the Writer’s Almanac by Garrison Keillor
Available by e-mail daily.
Further funny reading available at Amazon.com

As if there already wasn’t enough time in my life… Now I’ve been facebooked; pressganged into the mother of all social networking sites. I thought that I could resist. I thought I could just say no, but I’ve got a techno-geeky monkey on my back, and new shiny web based tools for wasting time are my stock and trade. So if you’ve been facebooked too, I’ll see you there sometime.

…it was like a black tidal wave came down from the sky…

Today is the anniversary of Black Sunday, the day in 1935 when a windstorm hit a part of the Great Plains known as the Dust Bowl. When the day started, the weather was sunny and calm. People were on their way home from church, or out visiting friends for lunch, when they saw huge flocks of birds flying south, away from a dark black cloud on the northern horizon. As the cloud approached, people realized that it wasn’t a storm cloud, but a cloud of dirt, blown up by the wind. Witnesses said it was like a black tidal wave came down from the sky. It became as dark as night as soon as the cloud descended. Static electricity stalled cars and shorted out telephone lines. People standing a few yards away from their homes got lost in the darkness, and grabbed onto fence posts to keep from being blown to the ground. It was later estimated that the storm carried 300 million tons of soil through the air.

Her Own Pirate Ship

Arrrgh, Avast there ye scurvy blog readers, prepare to be boarded! It’s easy these days to come up with a birthday gift that kids will like; Playstation, DVDs, MP3 players etc. It’s a little harder to come up with a present that will knock their socks off and inspire imaginative play. This year we built the girl’s room into her own pirate ship. Complete with Johnny Depp posters.

Today is Easter Sunday in the Christian Church, the holiday that celebrates Jesus’ resurrection from the dead. Easter is one of the few floating holidays in the calendar year, because it’s based on the cycles of the moon. Jesus was said to have risen from the dead on the first Sunday after the first full moon of spring. For that reason, Easter can fall as early as March 22nd and as late as April 25th.

…Easter comes from an ancient pagan goddess…

The word “Easter” comes from an ancient pagan goddess worshipped by Anglo Saxons named Eostre. According to legend, Eostre once saved a bird whose wings had frozen during the winter by turning it into a rabbit. Because the rabbit had once been a bird, it could still lay eggs, and that rabbit became our Easter Bunny. Eggs were a symbol of fertility in part because they used to be so scarce during the winter. There are records of people giving each other decorated eggs at Easter as far back as the 11th century.

On this day in 1917, the United States formally declared war against Germany and entered World War I. American participation in the World War permanently transformed the nation. In order to meet increased demands for goods, the federal government expanded dramatically, taking an unprecedented role in guiding the economy. Women got involved in the war effort and impressed enough of the men they worked with that they won support for voting rights shortly after the war. The war also shortened women’s skirts, since it created a scarcity of wool. And it probably started the widespread American addiction to cigarettes, since American soldiers got to buy cigarettes at much cheaper prices while serving abroad.

…was just the beginning of the United States’ policy of military intervention in world affairs…

At the time, the war had been going on in Europe for three years, but there was no real immediate threat to the United States. Up until then, Woodrow Wilson had been opposed to the war. His campaign for president in 1916 included the slogan, “He kept us out of the war,” though Wilson never used that phrase himself.

But two things changed Wilson’s mind. The first was that Germany had declared unrestricted warfare on American merchant vessels, and began torpedoing any ship they thought was carrying munitions to the British and the French. At that point, the United States was the biggest supplier of munitions to the British and the French. And the second was that the United States intercepted a telegram from Germany to Mexico, asking for an alliance against the United States. If Mexico was willing to attack the U.S., the Germans said they would help Mexico regain Texas, New Mexico, and Arizona.

So President Wilson asked Congress for a declaration of war on April 2. The declaration passed almost unanimously, and war was officially declared on this day in 1917. One of the few people who spoke out against it was the pacifist Senator from Wisconsin, Robert La Follette.

About 3 million American men were inducted into the military. And though they fought for only a short time, it was enough to make a difference. Between the financial support, supplies, and reinforcements, the American entry into the war was the turning point that helped bring it to an end.

The war was extraordinarily expensive for the United States, costing about $1 million per hour in the last 25 months of the war. The amount of money the U.S. government spent on World War I was more than the combined total of what it had spent in the previous 100 years. Woodrow Wilson hoped it would be the war to end all wars, but instead it was just the beginning of the United States’ policy of military intervention in world affairs.

Canada Office Geese

Like the swallows to San Juan Capistrano, or the hot dog vendors to the corner of Yonge & Bloor streets in downtown Toronto, nothing says spring more than the return of the Canada geese to the television station. It won’t be long until there is nesting and the pitter patter of tiny waddlers all around the parking lot.

On the downside, there is a lot of shoe cleaning to do.