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I‘m not sure how it works in other parts of the world, but in Canada coffee is a sacred trust. The average Canadian commuter spends about 1-2 hours on the road every day getting from home to work and back again. The only thing that keeps us sane and prevents general civil disorder and mayhem from erupting in the frozen north, are the strategically placed coffee shops along the avenues and highways of the nation. These bastions of caffeinism are the very symbol of social cohesion.

…I nearly spit the unholy mixture across my windshield…

We each have our favourites; Tim Horton’s is the most popular and most identifiable with Canada. Coffee Time, Starbucks, and others make up the rest. Being a fiercely democratic and individualistic people, Canadians also have their own unique ways of drinking the dark waters of life. You can have a regular, sweet or lite, cream only, a “double double” - twice the cream twice the sugar, or as I like it, black (as Jaun Valdez and his donkey intended coffee to be consumed). Most of us early morning road warriors pick up our fix at the drive through window. We mumble our order into the microphone, drive to the appointed window and receive the communion that powers our morning.

Now I like to get on my way after picking up my coffee. I drive down the highway for 5-10 minutes and let the coffee cool from volcanic to drinkable temperatures. While keeping my eyes firmly on the road I do the one hand lid open maneuver and consume the black gold. Ah coffee the way I like it, what could be better? Well I don’t rightly reckon I know, but I know what’s worse. Worse is taking a big swig of precious rich black coffee only to be assailed with the taste of too much sugar and too much cream! Any trace of those two elements is too much for my coffee. I nearly spit the unholy mixture across my windshield. A trust has been broken here. If a man’s home is his castle, his coffee has to be something right up there with say the front portcullis. They got my order wrong. I feel violated.